fuckingflorida:

-”You’re too pale to live in Florida,” they say, “Come outside”. It is 1 in the afternoon. You do not listen. You retreat to the shadows and wait.

-Rick Scott is governor again. You don’t remember how or when it happened. I didn’t vote for him. You didn’t vote for him. I didn’t vote for him. You didn’t vote for him. Your eyes are bleeding and your children have gone missing.

-The Heavens open up, flooding the world below. “Why didn’t you bring an umbrella?” they ask. “It’s going to be a beautiful afternoon,” you murmur, framed by the flash of a nearby lightning strike.

-The Snowbirds have come, escaping the bitter cold. Once again you swerve to avoid hitting the car of an aging soul. Perhaps you, too, have come to escape the bitter cold.

-John Morgan appears on the side of the road. He’s in your car. He’s in your living room. “For the people,” you whisper over and over, pressing your eyes shut.

-Florida Man has stabbed his neighbor to death over a missing corn dog. He is the hero Florida deserves, but not the one it needs right now.